Making a Fool of Myself

by Rubber Band Gun

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50 LIMITED EDITION RBG CASSETTES NOW AVAILABLE
THE FIRST EVER RBG MERCH!!
www.winspear-records.com/store/rbg-making-a-fool-of-myself

RUBBER BAND GUN
Proudly Presents SUPER CHAPTER II:
MAKING A FOOL OF MYSELF

Starring the Channel 17 News Team...

HORACE A. HOBART - The tortured weatherman protagonist; hated and mocked by his coworkers, he is prescribed medication for his mental instability which slowly corrupts his consciousness into seeking revenge

REDD RENO - The cruel lead anchor and host of "The Hourly Update"
He is the main source of Horace's turmoil, acting as his arch-nemesis

CAROL FELLINGTON - Sportscaster by day, gambling addict by night, she partakes in the bullying of Horace with Redd and drinks her way through her work day


- Story Guide -



Hurricane Horace

- GOOD MORNING HORACE. IT'S A NEW DAY. HERE'S A WAY TO START IT OUT. TAKE YOUR MEDS. CONVERSE WITH THE MIRROR. HEAR THE VOICES. LISTEN TO THEM FOR YOUR SATISFACTION. FOR YOUR REVENGE. THIS COULD BE THE NIGHT.

Redd Reno: The Hourly Update

- REDD RENO IS ALWAYS LATE. HE STROLLS IN WHEN HE FEELS, AND HE FEELS WHEN HE FEELS LIKE IT. HE IS THE ALPHA AND THE BETA AND OCCASIONALLY THE GAMMA BEFORE HE GETS HIS COFFEE. A MAN OF MEANS AND NUMBERS, HE HAS NO SYMPATHY FOR HORACE'S CONDITION. IN FACT, HE AIMS TO AGITATE IT LIKE A CRUDE YOUNG BOY WITH A GOLDFISH IN A PLASTIC BAG. HE SHAKES HORACE LIKE THE ANIMAL HE BELIEVES HIM TO BE.

Carol Fellington With the Sports

- YOUR FAVORITE SPORTS LADY, CAROL, IS AT IT AGAIN. BETTING ON ANYTHING THAT MOVES, FROM THE PIGS TO THE PONIES. FROM THE SPORTS BALLS TO THE SUPER SECRET BOWL LXXXIII, CAROL IS GONNA THROW HER HAT IN THE CIRCLE. BUT LET'S SEE HOW SHE DOES AFTER A LONG NIGHT OF LOSES...

PROFESSIONAL CONFESSIONAL

- THE PEAK OF THE TENSION: THE DISCOVERY OF A VANDALIZED PRINTOUT ON THE BREAKROOM FRIDGE.
"IDIOT"
"LOSER"
THE LAZIEST OF ALL THE 5 LETTERED INSULTS.
STRAWS ARE BREAKING ON ALL KINDS OF CAMELS' BACKS. A TWINKLE IN HORACE'S EYE. THIS ISNT THE DAMN GRINCH AND I'M NO DAMN SEUSS. BUT I'LL BE DAMNED IF THIS ISN'T THE MOST IMPORTANT MOMENT OF HORACE'S LIFE. HE KNEW IT WOULD BE. THEY KNEW IT WOULD BE. THEY TOLD HIM IN THE MIRROR.

The End of the Mock

- HORACE'S SWAN SONG. HE STARES AT THE CAMERA, "LIVE ON AIR." HE CONFESSES, MAKES HIS PEACE, SIGNS OFF FOR GOOD AND THEN IS SILENT BEFORE HE HUMS TO HIMSELF, FOR HIS MANY SELVES. HE LOOKS TO THE LIGHT AND WALKS. SLOW AT FIRST, HE STARTS TO DANCE. HE DANCES HIS WAY OFF THE STUDIO FLOOR. THE LAST SOUND HE HEARD WAS HIS OWN.

credits

released November 18, 2015

***LYRICS AVAILABLE ON EACH INDIVIDUAL TRACK***



- All songs written and recorded by Kevin Basko at the Basko Family House in New Jersey between the summer and fall of 2015

add. vocals by Olive (Babies' Babies)
babiesbabies.bandcamp.com

Thanks to Olive Lurrie, Nick Palladino, Jonathan Rado, G&P Basko, and Horace. All stories and characters are part of the Super Chapters collection. -

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Track Name: Hurricane Horace
Today's gonna be so right
The cameras goin off and today your gonna keep a smile as a smile in LA
The cameras all that treats me alright
But you love me today
And then you'll love me a lot in LA

Oh the green screens gotta be right
There's a humidity floating in the air
Don't do it any favors
This could be the night I've waited for
This could be the night I'm remembered for
It could be the night I take the floor

Maybe then they'll say my name right
And they'll share there lunches
And they'll share a lot
And they'll share a little
Track Name: Redd Reno: The Hourly Update
**U CANT HAVE WHAT U WANT WHEN U WANT IT GET IT?
THE FUTURE'S ALL CLEAR TO ME I SEE IT ON THE SCREEN
U CAN HAVE WHT U WANT IF U FRY, THERES NO TRY
TRY HARDER TRY SOFTER
All PEOPLE SHIT KITTENS
DONT WAIT FOR THE CITY TO HOLD U IM NOT Ur KITTEN UR ALONE
WHEN THE GREAT RAPTURE ENSUES U DONT COME CRYIN TO UR OLD FOLKS THEYR ALL DEAD



I PROMISE UNTO THEE A WORLD WITHOUT STRANGERS
DONT COMPLAIN WHEN THE WORDS ARE LOST
ITS A GREAT LOAD BUT BEHOLD ITS ALL UR FAULT
NOT KITTEN
THE FUTURE'S A DIRTY ONE, WIPE UR MOUTH OFF
POLLINATE DONT HIBERNATE U CANt put your tongue in there
TAKE A SWEET THING, PICKLE IT FOR LIFE
Life IS SOUR AND DOESNT WAIT for u TO BE IN HEAt
U CANT SIT ON AN EGG AND HOPE TO SHIT GOLD**


Take the night off Reno
Take your hat off Reno
Track Name: Carol Fellington with the Sports
Working at night
Scripting the lines
Reading the playbooks and covering the fights on the tube
She sleeps at her desk
But she's up before noon

Heading advice
Feeding her vice
Taking her paychecks and throwing the dice at the tube
But she tells you
She tells you who she wants to lose
Horace knows her accountant
They know she doesn't tell the truth

But she's got all the kid she wants in her brother
Drifting to the bottom
To the bottom review

Baby im begging you please
It's the time of the year
we got sweeps this week
I promise I'll take all of the heat
From the network comprised of fish out of the water
News is getting farther
It's getting farther from you

Carol will you go when they close
All the stations
Low budget sitcoms
Something on the phone about nobodies watching the show after 3pm
They've gotta be wrong bout the numbers
The Nielson's slow
But they love me too
They've gotta believe that it's something
They love me, they love me so
The people that watch my show

Taping tonight
Drunk on the wine
She found in the break room she needed the time on her own
Now she's making fun on Horace all alone
But she don't care when she's lazy so lazy that she didn't read her bookies fee
She's wasting the time waiting in the middle
Drifting to the bottom
To the bottom review
Track Name: PROFESSIONAL CONFESSIONAL
Making a fool of myself x3
Making a fool for you to push around
With love and affection
Don't worry, we're on air

Every night I read the weather
To the camera and the crew
I take my eyes deep into that lense
And I look at you with your family
I show you where there's trouble and I show you that I care
About each and everyone of you beautiful people watching out there
And you know
When I speak on live tv I don't stutter my words i got diction and A really great tie
I'm professional (we love it)
I'm so professional (we love you)

my coworkers
Never felt the same about me
my coworkers
Never gave a damn about me
I no longer
Slept at night I needed to teach them
all a lesson
And show them how it hurts
I hear their laughs behind the break room door
But I can't stand it no more
light two bottles full of gasoline and toss them inside by the coffee machine

Cause I'm professional
I'm so professional

You can't be there you can't be there when the ocean dies
When the oceans tides come up
We can't be ready cause the walls are coming
We can't be ready for the morning when you wouldn't listen to me yesterday


Why light a fire in the studio when you know everyone?
Just a devious guy who's gotta do what it takes to survive
Too much time spent on the notion
That all the while the viewers at home know what's it's like alone

All at once the ceiling fell and it started to snow
A weatherman without his prompter, how could we know?
I never learned
Meteorology
Was it you?
Was it me?
No university would take me
Be my friend
I was young, I tried then
We're different people now
I read the weather now

Making a fool of myself